By This Point Next Year, I'll Be Writing Romantic Fantasy
Since I had to drive Amber to Union Station to catch a train back to Michigan this morning, I got to work at 7:45 a.m. This meant I got out of work at the same time as not-Kate. I ended up driving her home. The crazy thing is that the car ride home played out exactly just like one chapter from a novel. I couldn't have made it up any more interesting than it actually happened.
We got in my car in the parking garage near my work and before the car was even out of the parking spot, she said to me, "I have a date tomorrow." She had mentioned to me a couple of weeks ago that a friend of her roommate's was interested in her and so I figured it was him. I asked and it was confirmed.
Now not-Kate and me were in pretty much the same situation two weeks ago. She had a boy interested in her and yet he hadn't asked for her number. I was interested in not-Kate's friend and did not have her number yet. She basically had told me that if I wanted the number, I should get it from her friend. Well, the boy she was interested in asked not-Kate's roommate for not-Kate's number and then not-Kate's roommate asked not-Kate if it was alright if she gave him the number.
Of course it was since not-Kate was also interested in her roommate's friend. And not-Kate thought it was awesome that he finally asked for her number.
I saw the parellels and not-parellels of the situation and pointed out that I had asked not-Kate for her friend's number two weeks ago. Seeing that I was right, not-Kate agreed to text her friend right there in the car and see if I could get her friend's number.
By the time we were on Jackson heading past the United Center, I knew things were not going to go as I hoped. Not-Kate's friend texted back asking why I wanted her number.
Not-Kate turned to me and said, "why do you want her number?"
Of course I could have said a lot of things, but I didn't get much sleep yesterday so I said, "why do you think?" She said, "I know why you want her number, I just want you to saw it."
I said, "because I think she's awesome and I'd like to..." I couldn't really say the words. They seemed too real.
I just got really silent. Figuring the funny way out was the best way I said, "tell her I'm a telemarketer and I think she's a good target audience for what I'm selling." Then I said, "wow, that sounded really wrong."
The words were revised to, "he's a telemarketer. Why do you think?"
Not-Kate texted the message over and there was no response for a while. When it came back, I knew from the "awwwww" that not-Kate made that the news wasn't good. She said to me, reading the text message, "I just don't think of him in that way."
Which, of course, the logical side of me says makes perfect sense. I mean, I've only talked to her three times and one of the times was sort of a disaster because it was at a party at not-Kate's house where I was feeling pretty under the weather. But the other two times people who have been there had pointed out that we seemed to have some sort of connection.
And I sort of thought we did as well. We could at least exchange lines like from some sort of old male/female movie from the 1940s. And being as she's into movies like I'm into movies, I figurd that was a good thing.
I said to not-Kate that I had thought she had talked to her about this and that was why at her party, she had said, "you should ask [her] out." She even said this a couple of weeks ago, "you should have asked [her] out."
I thought it was only a matter of doing the asking because I believed the hype and I believed it had already pretty much been settled that she was interested slightly as well.
A few minutes passed before not-Kate got another text message from her friend saying, "I don't want to hurt his feelings. I think [he's] a blast!"
The girl who ended up inspiring the feelings that I'm writing the novel around did not seem to think that at all. I don't know what it is, but I think somewhere along the line, I've become like a homeless guy looking for a job. I'm seemingly too far gone down whatever path, and it honestly seems to be age, I'm down to be in a relationship or even seemingly get a date as of late.
All I'm really looking for recently is a chance and I don't even seem to get that. Even from girls who I thought had already considered the option and were willing to give me that chance.
I don't think all is lost yet and I hope not-Kate puts in a good word for me. But, with not-Kate's friend out of the picture as far as prospects go, now I have none. There are no girls out there that I'm interested in enough anymore to actually ask out. Now if a girl came along, I'm always willing to give almost anyone a chance (crack addicts and stuff, not so much, but friends of friends and the like). But I don't think there's a single girl interested in me out there.
Anywhere.
I mean, Amber, who still for some reason seems to think I can't do much wrong, said to me on the ride to dropping her off this morning that she didn't think if the two of us met now we would work. And this was after positing yesterday night that the present me and the present her (were she not in a relationship) might work unlike when we were together eight years ago.
It's only a matter of time before I can't write these romance novels anymore as I'll have completely forgotten what the concept even means.
---
I figured I could come home tonight and take solace in the fact that until December 1, I'd have other things on my mind and could bury this rejection.
I even had a captain's meeting tonight where I had to think of everything but this girl in coming up with the awards for the team and such. But even that couldn't distract me.
I did set an example of working through adversity and pounded out 1,562 words of the party scene (where Tabitha has a mild drug induced seizure). It's set the scene for a confrontation between Andy and Kate in the hospital waiting room (Andy, against Kate's objection helps carry Tabitha down the stairs from the party to wait for the ambulance) that really sets the stage for the end of "Drugs."
I started to imagine the envelope getting stoned off the cocaine that Tabitha cut with him but I think that was too light for what's happening. I can't write funny right now. Even though that's the one thing that I apparently still have going for me even if it just results in girls thinking I'm a blast and still not date material.
I don't know how funny the rest of the story is going to be. After all, this was a major blow.
---
I did cry inside with happiness a little earlier today with a message left by our ML Tim on the Chicago board:
I just wanted to take a moment to say how awesome displacedbeatnik is for leading the Word War this month. He's been a great motivator, and has been on top of things from the day he emailed me about word war negotiations with NYC and Toronto.
I think, after all is said and done, we should all chip in and buy him the biggest pint of whatever libation he desires.
Aside from that, everyone in Chicago has made me proud to be the Windy City ML this year (especially when it comes to talking smack on the ML board with the Toronto and NYC ML's about who will win). Thank you everyone for putting so much effort into this years NaNo.
This just made me think that there is some good left in me in some way and that I just can't get these girls to see it. But I've been thinking that for quite some time. Maybe that's the problem. It's not that I'm completely unimpressive it's that I'm no longer in situations where the people can be impressed by it.
Though that's the other thing with this girl. She has been and I just remember as I was mostly drunk singing "Punk Rock Girl" for karaoke and her singing along. I thought that she at least saw that I was capable of being pretty awesome and not just some hollow depressed shell. And maybe she did. I don't know.
We got in my car in the parking garage near my work and before the car was even out of the parking spot, she said to me, "I have a date tomorrow." She had mentioned to me a couple of weeks ago that a friend of her roommate's was interested in her and so I figured it was him. I asked and it was confirmed.
Now not-Kate and me were in pretty much the same situation two weeks ago. She had a boy interested in her and yet he hadn't asked for her number. I was interested in not-Kate's friend and did not have her number yet. She basically had told me that if I wanted the number, I should get it from her friend. Well, the boy she was interested in asked not-Kate's roommate for not-Kate's number and then not-Kate's roommate asked not-Kate if it was alright if she gave him the number.
Of course it was since not-Kate was also interested in her roommate's friend. And not-Kate thought it was awesome that he finally asked for her number.
I saw the parellels and not-parellels of the situation and pointed out that I had asked not-Kate for her friend's number two weeks ago. Seeing that I was right, not-Kate agreed to text her friend right there in the car and see if I could get her friend's number.
By the time we were on Jackson heading past the United Center, I knew things were not going to go as I hoped. Not-Kate's friend texted back asking why I wanted her number.
Not-Kate turned to me and said, "why do you want her number?"
Of course I could have said a lot of things, but I didn't get much sleep yesterday so I said, "why do you think?" She said, "I know why you want her number, I just want you to saw it."
I said, "because I think she's awesome and I'd like to..." I couldn't really say the words. They seemed too real.
I just got really silent. Figuring the funny way out was the best way I said, "tell her I'm a telemarketer and I think she's a good target audience for what I'm selling." Then I said, "wow, that sounded really wrong."
The words were revised to, "he's a telemarketer. Why do you think?"
Not-Kate texted the message over and there was no response for a while. When it came back, I knew from the "awwwww" that not-Kate made that the news wasn't good. She said to me, reading the text message, "I just don't think of him in that way."
Which, of course, the logical side of me says makes perfect sense. I mean, I've only talked to her three times and one of the times was sort of a disaster because it was at a party at not-Kate's house where I was feeling pretty under the weather. But the other two times people who have been there had pointed out that we seemed to have some sort of connection.
And I sort of thought we did as well. We could at least exchange lines like from some sort of old male/female movie from the 1940s. And being as she's into movies like I'm into movies, I figurd that was a good thing.
I said to not-Kate that I had thought she had talked to her about this and that was why at her party, she had said, "you should ask [her] out." She even said this a couple of weeks ago, "you should have asked [her] out."
I thought it was only a matter of doing the asking because I believed the hype and I believed it had already pretty much been settled that she was interested slightly as well.
A few minutes passed before not-Kate got another text message from her friend saying, "I don't want to hurt his feelings. I think [he's] a blast!"
The girl who ended up inspiring the feelings that I'm writing the novel around did not seem to think that at all. I don't know what it is, but I think somewhere along the line, I've become like a homeless guy looking for a job. I'm seemingly too far gone down whatever path, and it honestly seems to be age, I'm down to be in a relationship or even seemingly get a date as of late.
All I'm really looking for recently is a chance and I don't even seem to get that. Even from girls who I thought had already considered the option and were willing to give me that chance.
I don't think all is lost yet and I hope not-Kate puts in a good word for me. But, with not-Kate's friend out of the picture as far as prospects go, now I have none. There are no girls out there that I'm interested in enough anymore to actually ask out. Now if a girl came along, I'm always willing to give almost anyone a chance (crack addicts and stuff, not so much, but friends of friends and the like). But I don't think there's a single girl interested in me out there.
Anywhere.
I mean, Amber, who still for some reason seems to think I can't do much wrong, said to me on the ride to dropping her off this morning that she didn't think if the two of us met now we would work. And this was after positing yesterday night that the present me and the present her (were she not in a relationship) might work unlike when we were together eight years ago.
It's only a matter of time before I can't write these romance novels anymore as I'll have completely forgotten what the concept even means.
---
I figured I could come home tonight and take solace in the fact that until December 1, I'd have other things on my mind and could bury this rejection.
I even had a captain's meeting tonight where I had to think of everything but this girl in coming up with the awards for the team and such. But even that couldn't distract me.
I did set an example of working through adversity and pounded out 1,562 words of the party scene (where Tabitha has a mild drug induced seizure). It's set the scene for a confrontation between Andy and Kate in the hospital waiting room (Andy, against Kate's objection helps carry Tabitha down the stairs from the party to wait for the ambulance) that really sets the stage for the end of "Drugs."
I started to imagine the envelope getting stoned off the cocaine that Tabitha cut with him but I think that was too light for what's happening. I can't write funny right now. Even though that's the one thing that I apparently still have going for me even if it just results in girls thinking I'm a blast and still not date material.
I don't know how funny the rest of the story is going to be. After all, this was a major blow.
---
I did cry inside with happiness a little earlier today with a message left by our ML Tim on the Chicago board:
I just wanted to take a moment to say how awesome displacedbeatnik is for leading the Word War this month. He's been a great motivator, and has been on top of things from the day he emailed me about word war negotiations with NYC and Toronto.
I think, after all is said and done, we should all chip in and buy him the biggest pint of whatever libation he desires.
Aside from that, everyone in Chicago has made me proud to be the Windy City ML this year (especially when it comes to talking smack on the ML board with the Toronto and NYC ML's about who will win). Thank you everyone for putting so much effort into this years NaNo.
This just made me think that there is some good left in me in some way and that I just can't get these girls to see it. But I've been thinking that for quite some time. Maybe that's the problem. It's not that I'm completely unimpressive it's that I'm no longer in situations where the people can be impressed by it.
Though that's the other thing with this girl. She has been and I just remember as I was mostly drunk singing "Punk Rock Girl" for karaoke and her singing along. I thought that she at least saw that I was capable of being pretty awesome and not just some hollow depressed shell. And maybe she did. I don't know.
Maybe this can all be a scene in next year's novel.
posted by incendiarymind at 8:43 PM
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